random ramblings...

ya know it is really funny... emotions... they are so... random. you want them gone, but you want them to stay. you want them for certain things and certain people, but not for others. when they are there and you don't want them, you obsess over them. and when they aren't there, it doesn't make any sense. sad emotions here, ecstatic emotions on my sleeve, confused emotions there, inappropriate emotions hidden, wonderful emotions timid to show their faces... it's a messy, tangled web. all of these emotions... even if you aren't an "emotional person," how can one person keep it all straight?

sorry for that confusing cathartic nothingness...

a few of my favorite things...

sleeping like a baby.

long walks on the mississippi river.

new coffee shops with fun new tea.

laughing so hard it hurts.

kissing boys.

squinting as i watch the sun set.

eating healthy.

feeling healthy.

being healthy.

leaves on the ground crunching under my bare feet.

windows down as i drive.

peeling labels off michelob ultra.

football wins and heartbreaks.

phone calls from far away friends

homemade quilts.

homemade cookies.

fresh veggies on a saturday morning.

texts that make me blush.

let it be.

autumn breezes.

...just a few of the things that have filled my heart with joy the past few days...

yea, id say i am a happy girl.

let it be

I did it. Never, ever, EVER thought I would....

I love it so much. So happy with my decision.

life the life you love

Well, my Tigers didnt pull out a win (which I will admit, caused a few tears) but I still had the most amazing weekend ever, thanks to Carrie, an amazing hike, PBR, and a track suit.

Hello, sunshine.

BIKE GANG

Touch the sky!

The universe will provide.

So needless to say, my time in North Carolina was phenomenal. I made a lot of realizations about my life, the changes that have taken place, and where I am heading. Thank you, Carrie, and to all of my new friends, for filling my heart with so much laughter!

It was tough leaving that happiness and coming back to Memphis, but I realized that I already do have a lot of happiness associated with this city. I mean, all things considered, I have had a pretty amazing time here thus far! And, I got to christen MY apartment by sharing a nice bottle of champagne with my friends! Bring it on, air mattress on the floor, bring it on. I am loving my life, and most importantly, I am loving MYSELF.

Celebration!

Dear Dabo,

Dear Dabo,
This weekend, Clemson plays UNC. Now I know this season has been a bumpy ride thus far, but if there is any way you could squeak out a win against UNC, I would really appreciate it. As my new found hatred for the Tar Heels will peak this Saturday at 3:30pm, I think beating the pants off those baby blue b*tches would be essential in my recovery process. So really, just open it up on them- no mercy. If bones are broken and players are hurt (on the other team, of course) that will only increase my happiness. So to you, Dabo, and to the Clemson Tigers football team, do this for me, please? I thank you in advance for the hard core beat down that will take place tomorrow.
All my love,
Amy

FREEDOM FEST!

If you've seen the movie Old School, you know what I am going for here! Amypalooza, Freedom Festival, Peace & Harmony Fest, whatever you wanna call it, it was amazing. Thanks, friends, for a spectacular night out. Nothing like drinking games (si, mucho gusto, arrrrrgg!), divers, tourettes, glowing bracelets, funny hats, trolley rides, wet willies, and dancing like a rockstar to mend a broken heart!

Maureen and I at Silky OSullivan's drinking the Diver.

Dani, Val, Maureen and I... VIP!

It has been a while...

Hello friends. I know it has been a while and I have gone completely MIA, and I apologize for that. Things have been, well, no need to describe.

Life in Memphis is getting better- MUCH better. I realized that when I first moved here, I really wasnt going out and doing things and meeting people as I should have. I was happy in my little bubble and couldnt see beyond that. Well, the past few weeks have really opened my eyes to what is out there, and man am I enjoying it! I have made some amazing friends here and cannot thank them enough for all they have done for me the past month. I couldnt ask for a better support system. I am really enjoying Memphis, believe it or not. I am acting like a little college girl again- going OUT 3 nights in a row?! I love it! Thank you to you, friends, for everything.

Val, Dani, Amy, Pam- on Beale street with one of the famous "flippers"

All of my friends and family, for that matter, have been my saving grace. I have been bombarded by phone calls, emails, letters, texts, visits, and unconditional love. Not a day goes by that I am not reminded endless times that I have the most fantastic and loving people in my life. I am so lucky to have you all by my side. I couldnt ask for more.

I dont know where I am heading, and I dont know what my new life will bring, but I know I am here for a reason. Despite everything that I have had to go through, I know I am here, right now, for a reason. I know the universe has a plan for me- I know everything will happen as it must. But I cant help but wonder...

So, yes, Bikram has taken a back seat. Unfortunately, this is a time when I need it most, but with everything going on, money is a terrible burden right now, and I just cant swing it. So, maybe this blog will take a turn for a little while... less about my Bikram practice, more about my journey to rediscover myself. I have spent 4 years giving myself to someone else that I have managed to neglect and lose myself. Now, it is my turn for a little TLC.

So here's to a new beginning... a new chapter in my life... a journey of rediscovery and personal growth... care to join me?

Amy Hit The Atmosphere

If I could make it rain today
And wash away this sunny day down to the gutter
I would
Just to get a change of pace
Things are getting worse, but I feel a lot better
And that's all that really matters to me

Well, Amy hit the atmosphere
Caught herself a rocket ride out of this gutter
And she's never coming back I fear
Anytime it rains she just feels a lot better
And that's all that really matters to me

We've waited so long
For someone to take us back home
It just takes so long
Meanwhile all the days go drifting away
And some of us sink like a stone
Waiting for mothers to come

There has to be a change I'm sure
Today was just a day fading into another
And that can't be what a life is for
And anything she said well she feels a lot better
And that's all that really matters to me

All I really know is I wanna know
And all I really know is I don't wanna know

[Counting Crows]

So what now...?

Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today.

Hi, Bikram. My name is Amy.

More to come later, but had to share the picture...