Spectacular session. For some reason, all of the pieces fell into place today- everything seemed to flow perfectly. The heat didnt seem to bother me at all- it usually doesnt, but I am often at least aware of the heat, even if it doesnt bother me all that much. Today, I wasnt even aware of the 105 degrees. My body felt ready and willing. It accepted postures openly, and allowed me to test my abilities. I focused a LOT on form today. I had this weird thought going through my head while focusing on form: If Bikram himself were watching me, what would he have me correct? I made many small self adjustments to ensure that I was practicing in a way that would make Bikram proud. I felt so confident and content with my practice.
Before class, I spoke with Sandra a bit about what motivated her to start practicing Bikram, and what encouraged her to become certified. We had a wonderful discussion, and I shared with her my nagging desire to become certified myself. She was thrilled with my determination and passion for Bikram. She shared some wonderful information with me and said I am welcome to ask any and all questions I may have for her about her practice or becoming certified. I hope to take her up on this- I have so many questions racing through my mind. I need to write them down.
I have many big decisions to make in my life. I have lived in limbo over the past 8 months- working a BS job in order to allow for time to finish my thesis, regain my focus, and figure out "what I want to be when I grow up." While I have accomplished one of those goals (thesis, whoo!), I still feel very lost as far as where I want to focus my life and where I should be heading next. I know we will be moving on August, but we still dont know where to (Memphis or Raleigh?)... I dont know where to start applying for jobs, or what jobs to go for. Do I go back into ABA? Do I stay in the field of Autism? Do I try something new? Do I get another BS job? I just dont know. I mean, I know that eventually I do want to resume working in the field of Autism, but I also have this ridiculous desire to pursue yoga.. as a career?! I just dont know. If I were to make the decision to becoming a yogi, August would be a perfect time to make this transition. But how would that effect my potential grad school applications? I want to apply for several programs this fall, but if I am doing Bikram 24/7, I may not have time to. Do I really want to go back to grad school? I do, but am I 100% ready? Do I just want to go for my license and practice at the MA level? So many questions bouncing around my head... It is like a mosh pit in my mind. I dont know what I want or when I want it. All I know is that I love Bikram, and I love helping children with Autism and their families. Now what?